The Importance of Women in Leadership
The best leaders integrate feminine and masculine leadership qualities. Because of our current health crisis, we have been given an “opportunity” to pause and empathize (two great aspects of feminine leadership) much more than we had in our “go-go” task-oriented world.
Now we have a chance, regardless of our gender identity, to strengthen who we are being.
Want to know more?
Listen in on my entertaining experience, “The Importance of Women in Leadership” in this short video.
If you’d rather read about it you can do so here.
A short while ago I was sitting in a CFO’s office. He asked us to come and help him with some direct reports on their executive presence. One vice-president, in particular, needed to maintain her composure when she was hearing things that she didn’t quite agree with. When I asked him for a little context, he said “Well, she doesn’t really like it that there aren’t a lot of women in leadership. I mean, I don’t know why I should care about that – it’s not really on my plate.” – and just like that, the committee came in…
You know the committee?
The committee I am talking about is the one you hear in your mind when you’re disagreeing with someone, Well I invite you to listen to the committee in my head in that moment:
- “We’re not getting anywhere with this attitude.”
- Another part of me said, “He’s the reason why less than 5% of Fortune 500 companies have women in CEO spots.”
- Yet different part of me said, “Hmm I know – show him the numbers. Do a case study- give him all the millions of dollars he’s missing because of lost productivity because without diversity we don’t have productive conflict and without productive conflict, we can’t have better solutions”
- Then I heard “Did he just say to me he doesn’t know why he should care about women in leadership? When HELLO – woman in leadership right here”
And in a split second – my mind went to a cartoon. A cartoon of a modern-day Sleeping Beauty.
This cartoon began in a very similar way – she’s in the woods sleeping, you see her lifeless body and there is her Prince. He came far and wide to find her. As he reaches down and grabs her to kiss her, and she kisses him back, they’re looking into one another’s eyes and he says “Will you marry me?” and she responds, “Marriage – no I got dreams, I got plans!” and she leaves him – right in the middle of the woods.
What that story told me – first of all, it’s really good breaking gender roles and expectations about women and men for both sides – but secondly, I have a choice.
I used to think ‘oh my god I have to do whatever the CFO tells me to do because that’s my team’s money coming in’ but I tapped into my POWER and I realized I could take a breath, which I did, and I responded. I said “Just for clarity – are you really wanting me to answer that question about why you might want to care if there are women in leadership?” and he said, “No no no no no”.
So I thought to myself – ‘Great I have a choice’. So I said to him “I will do this, I will partner with you, I will help your people if you partner with me. Will you be a part of the process?” He said yes.
I want to tell you something, after 17 years at American Express leading global programs and after being the founder of Metaspire working for many big companies – this is my secret sauce.
It’s called feminine leadership and it doesn’t matter if you’re a woman or a man or however you identify. This is about being. This is something I’m very excited to share with you – are you ready to hear about it?
The first thing I need to tell you is there was a study done – the Harvard Business Review – they interviewed 64,000 people across the globe to find out what modern leadership characteristics were most wanted. And eight out of ten – eight out of ten – of those characteristics were attributed to being feminine. I’ve boiled that down to an acronym called POWER.
P is for being Patient – that’s not easy for me, because I’m an overachiever- but I’m just letting you know that that’s the first one. As a result, I have re-framed that for myself, and maybe for you other overachievers. I re-frame that word to Pause, because I can’t force myself to be patient, but I can pause. When I pause I get perspective so that it can get a good plan and I don’t have to redo stuff because I rushed in too soon.
So that’s the P – Be Patient
O is for being Open – We all have intuition inside of us, we all have a leader within, and so by being Open to listening to those voices so that I could hear the good one that would lead me forward. And being inclusive even to the other voices that I might not agree with.
W is for being Warm – The first way to be Warm is being compassionate to myself, and being nurturing. The voice that maybe says “You’ve done enough, it’s time to go – you know – to the spa or do something fun.” That’s the voice that helps us establish good boundaries and a good work/life balance.
E is for being Expressive – Expressing and feeling my feelings, honoring them – knowing when to feel them. You know I work with corporations and sometimes they tell me – “Can you just .. she feels too much, I just don’t know what to do with her” or him. Feelings are not right or wrong, but it’s about how and where we are expressing them. Not everyone deserves to hear about your feelings.
R is for being Responsible The best leaders take 100% Responsibility for the way things are. Somehow that situation was put in our place and we either intentionally had that happen or unintentionally, but either way leaders – the best leaders – take responsibility for their world.
And that is Feminine Leadership POWER!
It is now a year later and I’m in the same CFO’s office. We’re reviewing what behaviors he noticed about this leader that I was working with, especially the woman director he had talked about earlier (by the way she got promoted to regional CFO – just as a side note).
As he was answering my questions he was pausing a lot. He was a much different person, he was pausing and reflecting, as though he wanted to be thoughtful in his answers.
And he was open! I had some different opinions than he did, and he was very open. Now I believe he’s integrating feminine leadership in his life – in fact, I told him that – and my heart was racing when I said it but I said it nonetheless – and he was open to it as well. I choose to believe that I helped him with his feminine leadership.
I’d love to know, how do you see the Importance of Women in Leadership playing out for you in your company?
Look forward to hearing from you.